Product Placement

It’s time for another instalment of Product Placement’s series of spa reviews, Preferential Treatments. But this one is a bit different, so move forward to the edge of your seat while I tell you about our exciting new reviewer. Ready? OK. It’s a man. Yes, it’s true, while my other half assumes that a ‘spa’ is one of a small chain of convenience stores, there are other men out there that like a bit of pampering. And they don’t all look like Niles Crane, either.

Without further ado, I will hand you over to Paul, who has kindly agreed to share his experience so that Product Placement can appeal to a wider audience (i.e. more than two men). And as his grooming is of Clooney-esque standards, any blokes who might actually be reading this should jolly well listen up.

What? NICKEL’s Complete Facial.
Where? NICKEL Spa, Covent Garden, London.
How much? £60 for a 60-minute treatment.
What for? Just because my partner has a jet set NYLON lifestyle, it doesn’t mean his other half can’t be a little self-indulgent with the housekeeping money every once in a while…
What happens? I was greeted warmly by my therapist, then taken from the shop area to the treatment rooms downstairs – where everything turned slightly ultraviolet and I passed four hanging punch bags (I got the subliminal message that although a spa, this was a very masculine one) before entering a very dark treatment room. The treatment itself started with a face cleanser, NICKEL’s own ‘super clean foaming facial wash’, which felt very gentle and soothing enough for me to pick up a bottle on the way out (£17). Then, to get my pores open, I had 10 minutes of very hot steam blasted onto the face. Next, extraction, and if this was a dental procedure you would expect some level of anaesthetic to be administered. But for facials it seems you just have to lie back and try not to think about how much gunk is being expelled from your pores, and that you’re paying £60 to be hurt. Relieved that we had moved on from squeezing bit, I relaxed with a face mask on and enjoyed a very pleasant head and neck massage, which went some way in helping me to forgive the therapist. To finish, the face mask was removed and a moisturiser and eye cream were applied.
Nice or nasty? I’m sure getting my pores to surrender whatever they had accumulated must have been truly nasty for my therapist. But it was truly nice for me.
Did it work? Yes – my skin looked far less dull and my pores (it’s all about the pores…) were noticeably smaller.
Did it last? For a couple of days, yes.
Cringe factor? More of a tip: if you have sensitive skin, don’t have the treatment mid/late afternoon if you’re going out later. Carrying off a red blotchy forehead isn’t easy.
Recommend it? It’s on a par with a visit to your dental hygienist: never the most comfortable or relaxing of experiences, but that fresh, clean feeling makes it worthwhile.